The Good News about Disappointment with God

We’ve all had disappointment with God, at least in small ways, but quite possibly in big ways. Like disappointment that God did not work something out that was important to you. Maybe he didn’t heal your illness, or a family member’s illness. Maybe he didn’t heal your marriage which you had prayed hard and long about. Maybe you just don’t feel his presence in your life.

The good news is that the disappointment you feel is probably a prodding for a very different kind of relationship that he wants with you.

A whole lot of people have disappointment with God. It’s likely the reason why a lot of them leave the faith. Others unconsciously leave active belief in God, but they still go through the motions of being a Christian.

Why does this happen? There can be multiple reasons. The one I’ve heard the most from people (including many people going through Divorce Care) and experienced myself, is that God didn’t fix the really bad things that were happening.

I think we don’t really understand the world we live in. When sin came into the world, it infected everything. Scripture says Satan is the “ruler of this world.” Life is hard. It may appear that some people don’t experience that. However, we don’t see what is hard in their life because we all tend to wear masks.

Consider people – including Christians – in 3^rd world countries. They may barely be getting by, with very limited shelter, terrible heat or cold, disease, etc. And yet many of them, especially the children, can be very happy. We American’s are usually way better off, but because we have much greater expectations, our minds make us unhappy with circumstances that a 3^rd world person would love to have.

Does God not love those people who suffer with really tough circumstances in other countries or our country? Of course he does! God doesn’t promise a lack of bad circumstances. Scripture says that the rain falls on the just and the unjust.

Scripture talks about the analogy of God as our Father – not a fallible human father but the best kind of father. He is very loving and wants us to grow up to be healthy responsible adults. Like any good father, his love does not mean he is trying to meet our desires all the time. If we keep running into the street as a child or touching hot stoves, he’s going to discipline that. As we grow older, even if we scream for him to solve our problems, he isn’t going to do that when he knows we need to grow more responsible. When we become teenagers and insist on all sorts of privileges or things we want, he is not going to become our enabler. He does all this because he loves us and wants us to be the best person we can be, someone who can face all sorts of circumstances that come our way and grow from them.

He also wants a close, growing relationship with us, and be constantly producing ‘fruit’ as he described in his story about the vine (John 15:1-11). And he really wants us to grow to “love him with all our heart, mind, and soul.” This requires him to be the center of our life. That is a huge commitment. It is very hard to make that commitment if you think your agenda for your life is better than his. How’s that working out for you? God has a much better plan for your life than your plan. He promised a “rich and fulfilling” (abundant) spiritual life (John 10:10). Even when tough circumstances come, God can use them to make you a better person and draw you closer and closer to him.

I’ve experienced this for myself. I’ve been a Christian since I was 9, and an ‘active Christian,’ but it all changed when I went through a divorce after years of working on it and praying about it. I almost lost my faith. I cried out to God in desperation from the emotional pit, and he began showering me with love. I lost my sense of entitlement and felt so much joy at his presence and love for me. Over weeks, months, and years – to where now, even with really tough physical circumstances – I keep feeling closer to God. I am even a mentally healthier person. Where I used to have things like Chronic Anxiety Disorder, be excessively concerned about what others think of me, and didn’t love myself, I no longer feel that. Prior to all of this, I never could honestly say I loved God, but now I can.

Not many will go down the route I did, but I am convinced that he wants everyone to experience being an active part of the vine and growing in loving God with all our heart, mind, and soul. Every ‘bad’ thing you experience in your life is not a reason to have a lesser life, but is building the great you God wants you to be – if you let him.

-          Mark