It tends to baffle us why God would ask Abraham to sacrifice his son, even though at the last second he stopped him.
Along similar lines, Jesus told his disciples that they could not be his disciples unless they hated their family (Luke 14:26). Again, it's hard for us to understand. For sure he is using a bit of hyperbole, which Jesus sometimes does to drive home a point, but he is also making a very strong point – love your family but never let them keep you back from doing what he asks of you.
I think there is an application for all of us in these stories. Following God & Jesus cannot just be a part of our life priorities. Consider his number one commandment: “Love God with all your heart, all your soul, with all your mind.” I along with a lot of Christians, didn’t really take it too seriously because how do you really love God? Our intellect mind is what we assume this is all about, but what about “all your heart, all your soul”? The heart indicates a feeling level. The soul means something that even many Christians don’t really consider, other than, ‘it’s what takes us to heaven.’ The Soul is the deepest part of us. It’s that part of us that God designed which only he can fill. We have a deep longing in there, which we typically try to fill with relationships with others but like ourselves, others are sinners, and will fail to achieve what our soul seeks. Jesus finishes this commandment passage by saying “The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments.” That means they are central to what God and Jesus are all about. In other words, we have to take this scripture very seriously. To love God, with all our heart, all our soul, and all our mind, no longer allows us to make God a part of our lives. He has to be the central priority of our lives. God is a jealous God, he doesn’t like other ‘gods’ seriously competing with him. For example, he says “No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money.” Money was noted, I believe, because materialism is one of the biggest temptations we face. But it’s not the only one by any means. Another high one is spouse, children, family or someone else. In retrospect, even though I was an ‘active’ Christian for many years, I made my spouse the center of my life, expecting her to fill my longing. So, when that relationship deteriorated and I lost it, I was deeply devastated. So back to when God asked Abraham to sacrifice Isaac and what Jesus said about hating your family. He is saying, “Compared to me being the center of your life, these have to be relatively unimportant. You have to be willing to do anything I ask.” This is a hard saying by our normal value system. Fallible human beings cannot and will not meet our longing forever. We are all broken and sinful individuals. Plus, it is not healthy to put that soul expectation on another for long. It can cause heartbreaks on both sides. I’ve seen scores of broken-hearted DivorceCare participants who become disillusioned with God after the breakup of their marriage because he allowed it to happen. Some may even leave active faith. On the other hand, there’s a good aspect to that failure, because it can cause people to rethink who God is. I’ve seen some DivorceCare people, realize they needed to re-calibrate their view of God from one that serves our agenda to one where we make him the love center of our lives. That has been my life-changing experience. The key thing is God’s agape love. He knows what we need most. He wants what’s best for us. We have to learn to trust in his love for us. He is ‘our father.’ Like any good father, he wants us to learn what is good and avoid what is wrong. We have to grow beyond being baby Christians, demanding that he do what we want. He wants to develop us into good, healthy, loving human beings with a love relationship centered on him.
Jesus’ family at one time insisted that he had gone crazy and needed to be reigned in. At that stage, Jesus made it clear that he wasn’t reliant on them. And only later did they come back, believing in him. We can’t take responsibility for the choices of our spouse, children who beyond the age of our responsibility, or others. That is between them and God. We need to show healthy love for them which includes not trying to interfere with what God is currently or will do in them.
The world is plagued by the results of the introduction of sin in the world. God isn’t a God that is making the circumstances better for Christians all the time, even if caused by the consequences of other people’s sin. The rain falls on the just and the unjust. He may answer some prayers our way, but he doesn’t put us in a bubble where we don’t suffer from the broken world. Nevertheless, he intends for those bad things to help us become better persons and Christians. Not just for this year, but for the rest of our lives. He wants us to grow all the time in relationship with Jesus and growing more and more ‘fruit’ (John 15:1-11) which includes love and joy. Despite bad circumstances that may come, he still wants us to find a “rich and satisfying life” in him (John 10:10). It won’t happen overnight. It’s through seeking him deeply and testing his ways more and more that you will begin to trust him. -Mark
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